under the stars and dreaming
have you ever slept under the stars? not just “outside” but really under the stars. no tent, no tarp just you and what NASA believes to be 100 billion of our closest neighbors in the milky way alone.
If you are going to start sleeping under the stars i’d recommend starting in Moab Utah. something about the clear desert sky that makes the interstellar lights seem within an arms length.
That is where i got started….almost. We had just ridden the White Rim trail, 108 miles, 9 hours, 3 liters of water, 11 energy gels, 5 nectarines, and 3 peanut toffee cliff bars later we were done. Alex and I had gone big-the only way we know how-and though we had forgotten our map in the truck, God allowed us to cruise among the painted canyonlands, not conquering-but dancing with a creation that made us feel very very small.
it was an adventure. and we were done. our expedition also included donnie, david and Nko who had climbed the sheer rock face of castleton tower. along with two hang gliding pilots, we had played in the desert and were ready to eat the bubbling red chili that simmered slowly over the glowing fire. after trading tales, inhaling steaming chili and sucking down a few Coronas we were ready to sleep.
when it came time for bed each of us went our own way. alex back to the black tacoma with the ever faithful adventure dog molly. me to my old red 4runner and the hangliders back to their marvelous blue tent. our alpine oriented friends simply rolled out their pads and zipped up their bags with only the sky as a canopy above them. As I willed my aching body into the back of my 4runner donnie turned and asked me why i didn’t sleep outside. “mountain lions and snakes.” I mumbled as I slid into the relative safety of my truck. he smiled knowingly-the kind of smile you get from a brother of 8 years who knows you are a scared little shit. I slept like a rock and awoke to find everyone in tact, no blood splattered remains from a fresh lion kill nor mummified friends poisoned by an angry desert rattlesnake.
they survived. maybe i’d survive if i slept outside? since that trip i’ve been to moab 4 more times, the closest i got to the stars was through the ripstop nylon walls of my northface tent. still am scared of the lions and snakes. i did start one night outside only to feel the creeping suspicion that i was not safe. i crawled back into the protected domain of my 2 lb 4 oz northface tent, pulled up my zipper (all the way closed) and rested. safety is a perceived reality isn’t it. last time i checked 200 lbs of highly evolved cougar could peel back nylon without much more than a flick of one of his 4 inch long razor sharp claws. i encountered a Puma once in the canyons of Colorado-pure power-whisper silent-lightening fast and a stare that will chill you for months.
what was it about the tent that made me feel safe?
i think it’s walls.
we feel safe when we know the boundaries around us. captivity and protection aren’t always that different are they? I am learning this is not all that different than how the Church has taught us to think about God. we are told of the tent of predictable theology-definable deity-formulaic religion. we crawl in each night hang up our picture of jesus, say our prayers and go safely to sleep.
never really exposed.
never aware of all that could await if we stuck our head out long enough to see 100 billion lights burning across the sky. never really in awe of glorious riches of the mystery of God.
our church community aims to sleep under the stars.
many of us have spent ample time in the tent. some have peeked out and wondered. others have been told it’s bad out there and it’s better to stay inside. some of us have spent a night our two out under the night luminaries only to retreat again when we heard a stirring in the distance. to live in real relationship with Jesus calls us outside of our nylon and pole boundaries and into the wide open spaces of the desert night.
together our passion is to know God. we want to create space in life where we can expereince him and one another.
the news flash is that he doesn’t live in temples made by human hands. He created the world and everything in it, the people and all who dwell in it. It is in him that all things live move and have their being.
it is a big universe, with lots of people with different thoughts, beliefs and world views. can be scary at times, all smeared with the dirt of humanity and full of real questions about God, life and faith.
my questions, your questions, we all have real questions.
And guess what-our questions matter-To God.
in fact this is the very place were we will encounter God. right there in the middle of the night
open
exposed
honest
scared
waiting
no hesitation, no fear of the unknown. simply a willingness to step out from the confining self preserving dogmas of the past and into a free pursuit of the Maker.
governed by the truth that perfect love drives out all fear.
as a church we want to leave behind a confined vision of God and find ourselves together under the stars and dreaming. our Creator Savior Lover and King waits for us.
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